Extra Extra Read All About It

John called today. He is back in Texas. Living about 90 miles away. I am not sure how long they will be there, but it will be interesting to see how that changes things. He already wants to see the kids this weekend. I think he is going to take them on Friday night or Saturday morn and bring them back Sunday night or Mon. morn. Santa is coming to our house here. John was fine with that request.

I am not sure how I feel about him being back. Part of me wishes he would just drop off the face of the Earth. Part of me is afraid the kids will love him (and her) more than me. Part of me is afraid that seeing him will dredge up old memories. This should be an interesting weekend.

In other news, I have had a couple of more dates. All with the same guy. He is super sweet and really fun to hang out with. Right now neither one of us wants to push things, so we are just having fun. I think that both of us want to go really slowly to protect ourselves and each other from hurt. The most frustrating thing for me is that I seem to do all the pursuing. And I have discovered John spoiled me. He would always say you look hot, beautiful, sexy etc. He was very verbal and demonstrative in showing me how he felt. The new guy not so much. I am constantly having to second guess things. I guess that is how it is in the real world.

I have recently discovered that I am impatient and a read the last page first kind of girl. Okay you can all stop laughing now. I really didn't know the extreme to which that went. Somebody should have taught me patience as a virtue long ago. I really like to know the end of the story. It is not so much that I want to control others. I just want to feel in control of me. So my prayer for the next year is that I learn to be patient and let life take its course. Right now, give me patience right now--lol.

Merry Christmas to one and all. I pray that God will richly bless you each and every one.

Becky